Take me across

My thoughts have been making me rather philosophical. May be it is an overstatement. May be it is not. Ultimately nothing’s going to last with me. I don’t know if I’m doing the right things with life. The right and wrong are so like one another; it is hard to tell them apart. A kind of reasonless restlessness sweeps me. My soul feels entrapped in something for which only I’m responsible for. If I choose, I could shake off this responsibility this very moment and soar to the skies of liberation. But I cannot and I will not. Something within me holds me from doing it. I’ve never been this headstrong before. Sometimes I think everything is a fad. A fad born out of endless boredom and endless quest for something conjured up by the magician above. A veil hides it permanently detaching me from reality. A call seems to emanate from nowhere, but I’m unable to hear it yet. Perhaps it is too loud for me to hear. That call travels from the entrails of something that is unfathomable. Something that is unreachable to the human hands. The farther I reach, higher it soars, belying the fact of my being. It is muffled by the commonplace sounds of my humdrum existence.
An existence of an automaton, revolving around the all-powerful society sickens me so much that it is nauseating sometimes. A nausea that brings forth the bitterness accumulated through the ages ready to spew on the so called values, whose meaning the creator himself has failed to understand. Within every deed and word, my mind dwells, struggling to understand the inner-meaning which is naked without the garment called innocence. Every struggle seems to be devoid of an ultimate purpose. Nevertheless, tiny wisps of comprehension climb up through the chimneys of humanity, clouding the earthly vision, yet providing the most splendid view of hope. A shore of promise beckons, only there isn’t a ferry to take me across.